It’s been 3
years, 3 months, and 5 days since I last updated this blog. In that time, I lived in New
York City for two months, worked on a Netflix movie (True Memoirs of an
International Assassin), lost my mother to cancer, learned how to knit, took an
intensive Professional Make Up class and visited 6 different countries. Even
though my summary is only a couple lines long, I don’t know if you can tell it’s
been an intense ride.
Right now, I have a steady job
which helps me pay for therapy twice a month, a yarn addiction that has me knitting
my first sweater and for all the scrapbooking supplies I’m obsessing about
while taking an online class.
This new attempt to keep up a
blog comes with no other strings than the need to write. I’ve always wanted to
be a writer, when I was in elementary and high school I used to write emotional
poems about all the intense emotions I felt. When I moved to college I even
took an online screenplay class at the Gotham’s Writer institute. I even had
one of those timelines that had me becoming the first Dominican to win an Oscar
for an original screenplay. At some point, I literally lost all my writing. I’m
not saying I lost my inspiration but my actual writing. I had transcribed all
the stuff I had written in school then thrown away all the different notebooks
I had them in only to later have that one notebook stolen from my place of
work. Later when I had a computer and was taking those online classes I never
did any backups and when that laptop got friend on a power surge I lost all
that too.
At the time, I took all the disappearing
writings as sign that my choice of career was the wrong one. I stopped writing all together and only picked
back up when the blogging boom started but I’ve never could keep it up.
Yesterday in therapy, I had a
breakthrough. My biggest obstacle when writing is my fear of making mistakes, it’s
my fear of showing the world something I created and have the world tell me is
lacking, it’s my fear that if start ill end up coloring outside the lines. I
never thought lack of commitment was due to fear, but now I know better so instead
of hoping to start a blog so I can make a business out of it, or to follow a
themed trend, or even to have an audience……
Today I start a blog just because
I want to write.
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